How To Interrogate A Kidnapper
by ClairvoyantDreamer1011
Summary: What do you do when you find your younger brother tied to a bed post, gagged and naked with a man standing in front of him? Scream 'PSYCHOPATH' and deliver a Lucy Kick to his spine, of course! [Crack fic] Sting/Rahkeid (or is it Larcade?) and slight Lucy/Gajeel.


'What the actual fuck?'

Lucy's right eye twitched as she took in the mess in the apartment she shares with her younger brother. Clothes were littered across the floor of the living room, empty bottles of beer and a few packets of chips were scattered on the beautiful, new sofa that _she had just bought two days ago_ , and the familiar smell of sex overwhelmed her senses. The blonde gagged as she noticed that the door to her brother's room was slightly ajar.

She groaned, taking off her demonic high heels and throwing them to the side before marching to the brat's room. Oh, she was going to make Sting pay for the mess he made. Maybe a couple of hours of listening to Gajeel's new song? (Don't get her wrong - she loves her boyfriend but one _Shoo-ba-doo-ba-doo_ was one too many _._ )

'Sting, get your unhygienic ass out here-' Lucy's jaw dropped as she took in the unholy sight of her brother being gagged and tied to the bed post. Naked. A man with platinum blond hair stood with his back facing her.

Rage overtook her and all sense of reason escaped her as she delivered her infamous Lucy Kick to the bastard's spine, instantly paralyzing her younger brother's captor. Hey, when you grow up with an older brother who's a MMA champion and a pyromaniac and a federal agent as a best friend, you learn things. Not good things perhaps, but things that come in really handy when there's a freaking _psychopath_ tying her baby brother on a bed post with - _wait, was that red silk?_

Imagine her surprise when the psychopath - _who should probably be admitted to a hospital because he may just be paralyzed for the rest of his life_ \- stood up without a glitch and turned around to look at her.

She looked at the man, then at her brother who was now rolling his eyes at her.

'What the fuck?'

* * *

Once again, Lucy Heartfilia-Dreyar can't help but ponder about the insanity that goes on in her life. At age sixteen, she witnessed her older brother's rebellion against their father as he tried to bring down the Heartfilia Roadways Company in an animalistic rage. And at age seventeen, when Laxus was being rehabilitated, she gets kidnapped by a piercing-covered sex god of whom she's currently dating and nearly gets beaten to death before her friends came for her. And she won't even mention about how her now-best friend, Erik 'Cobra' Cubellious, had gone rogue during one of his ops and took her hostage along with his crew.

But never mind all that, right now, all Lucy could think of was 'hot damn'.

Now fully-dressed, Sting and the not-so-pyscho-psychopath were sitting in front of her. She eyed the young man skeptically, the feeling of deja-vu hitting her almost immediately. He reminded her of her best friend, Natsu - the slanted onyx eyes, the familiar curl of his lips... But that's where the similarities end. Natsu was fire; but this man was more subdued - he exerted an air of confidence yet was polite and quiet. Not to mention the man's blond hair that was a far cry away from the pyromaniac's bright pink hair.

The silence proved to be too much for Sting. He blurted, 'Look, I'm sorry I ruined your couch, Lu. I swear I'll pay for any -'

'Who is this?' Lucy cut him off, her tone neutral and commanding. The young man met her stern brown eyes with unwavering calm. Lucy was secretly impressed. He survived her Lucy Kick and didn't flinch under pressure. Good. That alone puts him above a good quarter of the Quantico novices she'd been training.

She approves even more when she sees him share a glance with her brother. _Is this okay?_ Sting nods and the man turns back to her. 'My name is Rahkeid Dragneel,' Lucy raised her eyebrow, prompting him to continue. The man hesitated. 'I...am Natsu's nephew, madam,'

Sting cut in nervously, 'Um, his dad's Zeref, you know, Natsu's emo brother? Well, technically, Zeref is Ra's adopted dad, since he and Natsu found him when he was little,'

Lucy nodded slowly, taking in the information with as much calm as she could muster. She vaguely remembers Natsu talking about the annoying carbon-copy of his brother, though at the time she had misinterpreted the person as a friend or co-worker of Zeref's.

'So...Rahkeid, is it?' A firm nod. 'How long have you been in this...relationship with my brother?'

Rahkeid has the decency to blush. 'For approximately five months, madam.'

'And why is it that you failed to inform me of this development, Sting Heartfilia-Dreyar?' Lucy demanded, not quite angry at how her brother has been sneaking around behind her back, but more disappointed at the fact that he didn't trust her enough to tell her about it.

'I-um, Ra wanted to make it official, but I was the one who told him to wait!,' Sting blabbed, looking at Lucy guiltily. Lucy instantly softened and she opened her mouth to answer.

'It is not your fault, Sting,' Rahkeid cut in harshly. He turned to look at his lover. 'I am at fault as much as you are, bee, so stop taking all the blame again. I hate it when you do that,' Rahkeid raised his hand to Sting's cheek, caressing it softly. Lucy was at a crossroads. She wanted to squeal at the obvious love and affection shared between her brother and the Dragneel kid; but at the same time, she wanted to just say, 'screw it', drag Dragneel to her room -cough, torture chamber,cough - to properly interrogate the kid to make damn sure he wasn't stringing her baby brother along like the previous bastard.

(Of course, she and Laxus had ensured that the sniveling _bitch_ wasn't going anywhere other than the hospital after they overheard the jerk laugh with his friends about how pathetic their baby brother was in the bedroom. She was still disappointed that she wasn't able to completely paralyze him. People called Laxus the Lightning God; but she - the tiny, fragile Heartfilia girl who seemingly couldn't hurt a fly - was called the Celestial _Demon_ for a fucking reason.)

Rahkeid placed his hand on Sting's and turned to face Lucy again. 'I apologize on both of our behalf. It was my fault as much as his. I will gladly accept any punishment for my untruthfulness, madam.' Normally, Lucy would be irked whenever a recruit answered for someone else, but she made an exception. Every second with this kid only made her approve of him more. He was confident but polite, respectful of his elders but firm when needed, and not to mention he was sexy as hell. Of course, he couldn't hold a candle to her Gajeel, but still the kid was hot. And based on the position she caught her brother in, he was creative as well.

She liked him.

'Hmm,' Lucy pretended to ponder on the issue. She smirked when she noticed her brother fidget in his seat. Rahkeid was blushing as well but he met her gaze fearlessly.

'Well,' she began. 'I don't like how the both of you lied to me. Laxus and I raised you better than this, Sting,' Both Rahkeid and Sting flinched. 'But, I'm not angry. I'm just disappointed at how you didn't trust me and Laxus enough to tell us about your relationship.' Lucy smiled softly at her brother as he looked at her, gratitude and guilt shining in his blue eyes. 'Sting, don't you ever think for a second that I'll stop you from finding happiness, you deserve every single bit of joy you can get,'

'I guess I was just worried you would react to Ra like how you did to...Dan,' Sting said. Lucy immediately reached out to touch his cheek from her spot across his. 'Oh, Sting, Dan was a jerk who didn't deserve you. But, Rahkeid...' She glanced at the said man. 'I can tell that he's a keeper.' She winked.

Sting beamed at her. Lucy melted. Oh, since when did the chubby, bright-eyed boy whom she and Laxus fell in love grow up so quickly? Despite Sting being both her and Laxus's half brother, they loved him all the same. He was always the brightest out of the three of them, but he was always the first to get his heart broken. Lucy grew up motherless, so she learned to toughen up and face reality earlier than her peers while Laxus grew up with an abusive father. Both of them never received much affection when they were kids, so when Sting was born, they showered him with all the love they could give. It was one of the reasons why he wore his heart on his sleeve, giving a part of him to everyone he meets; but it was also one of the reasons his heart kept getting broken so easily.

Snapping out of her daze, Lucy cupped a hand and leaned forward, her previous, stern demeanor disappeared and was replaced with a bright smile. 'So, Rahkeid,' she looked at the blonde with curiosity. 'Tell me, how did you meet my annoying, unhygienic mess of a brother?'

She expected the fierce blushes on her brother and his lover's face, but she most definitely did not expect the answer she received.

'I - ah - may have tried to kill him...?'

'YOU WHAT?'

* * *

Okay...that was rather intense. But super fun for me to write! I do not know why but after reading the latest chapter of the manga, I have completely fallen in love with Rahkeid/Sting - I mean, they're both sexy-as-hell blondes and their magic is similar...what's not to like, right? XD Anyway, I actually wrote this to get this insane pairing out of my head so I can concentrate on my other stories, but I do hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I do. :)

Read, review, follow and fav, guys! Until next time.


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